Love on the rocksSo many of us move through life helping others, giving to others, and being there for others. These are all beautiful things that bring out our generosity, our free giving spirit, our goodness, our kindness, and our big hearts.

The power of giving is strong. Giving makes the world a better place. It feels good to give to others. It is a huge part of my personal live and you see it everywhere in the blogosphere. People are helping people and I believe the more you give the more the universe will give back to you.

I get this.
I believe this.
Giving is part of my inner workings.

And still, I’m concerned.

I’m concerned that we may be missing something (or someone). I’m concerned we may be giving so much to others that we don’t have enough to give to ourselves.

I believe there must be a balance {a balance between giving to others and self nurturing}.

Do you give yourself permission everyday to take care of yourself?

Do you give yourself permission everyday to enjoy “Me Time”?

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section.

photo credit: James Jordan

Showing 53 comments
  • I definitely try to find some “me time” in every day. I really do think it’s important and I think it makes you a better person when you’re around other people. It sounds like it’s selfish but, really, it’s self-less!

    Positively Present´s last blog post..who’s afraid of the big, bad past?

  • Stacey, I read this – and it’s like this is something I know – and yet – it just doesn’t always happen. Although, that said – I do have a couple of things on my plate I’m looking to get off – and not replace with something new. I wonder – no – I’m pretty sure – that me thinking about all of this a bit more is directly related to my visits here the last several months. Again – it’s something I already knew – it’s just that I wasn’t actively thinking about “me”. You help me to do that! I mean this very seriously – you’ve been a big help in me just thinking about the idea of self-care more — which is today taking me down roads of simplifying my life – and balancing it all out too. Thank you Stacey!

    Lance´s last blog post..Sunday Thought For The Day

  • Positively Present – I agree. Putting yourself on your to-do is a very self-less act in the long run.

    Lance – I give you permission to say “no” more often. Can you give yourself permission to say “no”?

  • I feel that sometimes I’m almost too good at having ME time; I tend to be introspective and so need to keep turning my focus to others.

    Jamie

    steadymom´s last blog post..Out Walkin’

  • Stacey, I hate shamelessly self-promoting my blog but this subject is vitally important to everything going on in one’s life. To be truly present for one’s self is the first step in ensuring the health of one’s self, one’s relationships, one’s goals, etc… Now for the self-promotion, a recent post on my blog discusses a recent ‘state’ I was in called self deception. Read if you would like… And don’t hesitate to comment… http://bit.ly/ijola
    Sincerely,
    Darren Sproat

    Darren Sproat´s last blog post..Something Incredible is Coming

  • Stacey,

    I’m with Steadymom on the other side of the spectrum in this regard. Having no husband or children, I can have as much ‘me time’ as I want. So I have to consciously remind myself to be a little more selfless and put others first. Not just in terms of time too, but in terms of compassion, trying to understand what others are going through, and realising that it isn’t as easy for others to have personal time as it is for me.

    Daphne @ Joyful Days´s last blog post..Energize Your Home and Life with Feng Shui

  • I agree, and I’m getting better at carving out time for myself every day. When I do, I am so much more patient with my kids!

    Vered – MomGrind´s last blog post..10 Ways To Love Yourself As A Woman

  • Hi Stacey. I don’t give myself enough permission to take Me Time. I can be too accommodating in the sense that I will tend to put other people’s needs ahead of my own most times. I had to say “no” to a friend over the weekend and it was very hard to do. But I did it and felt better for it.

    Davina´s last blog post..Mindful Melancholy

  • Now that I’m a divorced mom, I look back and realize how I might have done things differently in my marriage. And one thing I would definitely have done is take care of me as much as I took care of my family.

    You can’t be a good partner or a good mom (or dad) if you are not in a healthy, happy place yourself.

    It’s about finding a healthy balance, and that includes “me,” too.

    Kat Wilder´s last blog post..Is his equal the same as my equal?

  • Steady Mom – I think this is the beauty of creating a balance.

    Darren – Shamelessly promote away! I’ll look at your post tomorrow.

    Daphne – Enjoy your “me time” and hold on to it as you move into new stages of your life.

    Vered – I hear you are getting better at carving out time for yourself based on some of the recent comments you have left on my blog. Cheers to you.

    Davina – I give you permission to give yourself permission (not sure if it works that way) to say Yes to you.

    Kat – What a beautiful life lesson. May all moms take care of themselves as much as they take care of their families.

  • Hi Stacey – I find this topic very interesting, and I agree with your take on it very much. I think there is far too much emphasis “out there” on helping others, and people saying this is the way to happiness (or whatever).

    I think people who are happy and healthy naturally want to share the love they feel by serving people and the environment, and the way to get to this place is to focus on becoming happy and healthy ourselves. I also suspect that people who focus excessively on helping other people can very often be using this as a cop-out from fixing their own life up. – R

    Robin´s last blog post..Sondra Ray – Rebirthing And Physical Immortality

  • I’m affraid I enjoy a bit too much of “me time”. I think I should do more constructive stuff throughout the day.

  • Hi Stacey,

    You know who doesn’t get enough time for themselves? Mothers.

    My wife (an amazing mother of 2 boys) works tirelessly to make sure that her family is always taken care of. She is lucky to sneak in 15 minutes of time for herself each day before going to bed exhausted.

    She’s working on finding more time for herself, and I’m trying to juggle my schedule so that she can do this. I think she will greatly benefit from this extra time in the long run – and so will her family!

    Jake | Revive Your Life´s last blog post..The Importance of Sustainable Farming

  • Robin – I’m hearing you say you need to take care of yourself and be happy w/ yourself first. Thanks for your insight.

    Kotlina – I’m hearing you need a sense of balance.

    Jake – I agree. I’m shifting my blog to focus more on the needs of moms. May all moms find time to take care of themselves.

  • Hi Stacey,
    I have always been great at me time. I have all I want now. When I was raising my family I we always took couple time and I always took me time.

    I took trips by myself. One that stands out is I broke my ankle sking and I had a cast and crutches and it was very difficult to be at home with my 4 tweens. Once I got rid of the crutches and got a walking cast I hoped a plane to Florida, stayed in a hotel for week, sat in the sun and did nothing!
    I was such a good mom when I got back!

    I took day trips to see my sisters and I took weekends with girlfriends. Sometimes my mom would help my husband and sometimes he would handle it himself.

    When the girls were in high school I was about to gradutate with my bachelors degree. I had a major in Spanish and did an internship in Mexico for 3 months! My mom and husband handled it all.

    Sounded selfish to some of my friends and family. But I honestly can say we had a good marriage because of it all.

    What I always did was leave detailed lists on who had what chores while I was away. I rewarded them for following them.

    Keep up your good advice. You are saving relationships with your advice!

  • I think it’s important that you give your best where you have your best to give, otherwise, you can drain yourself.

    I think renewal and downtime and taking care of your own basics builds a firm foundation for lifting others up.

    J.D. Meier´s last blog post..How To Design A Fulfilling Life

  • I completely know how this scenario works and it has been to the detriment of my health. I have always been a very giving person and I literally gave until there was nothing left for me and it put me into a depression that was very powerful. I gave and gave to others and never myself and didn’t get from others what I gave and I suffered for it. I am a very empathetic person and when I gave to everyone else, I took their pain from them and it all weighed down on me. It wasn’t until someone pointed that out that I realized what was happening and I had to work really hard to change it.

    Jenny´s last blog post..Still No Title…But Here’s More!

  • Tess – I love going on trips by myself too. Thanks for cheering my on. Your words are heartfelt.

    J.D. – Say yes to renewal and no to draining yourself. How difficult can that be? Unfortunately, for today’s moms, it is very difficult.

    Jenny
    – May your self nurturing cup overflow with me time.

  • Hi Stacey,

    Giving all the time is a recipe for burnout I think. Giving joyously is one thing, doing it compulsively and because we should is likely draining.

    Mostly I’m good with me-time. At the moment a bit too busy – funnily enough I’ve now got a cold for the first time in a long time!

  • Hi Stacey,
    I am not afraid to take me-time. I need it. And sometimes I do not get enough. But I know that if I don’t get some dose of it, I am not able to give to others what they deserve. So it’s in their interest. I am lucky that my husband knows this. He takes his me-time as well so we’re pretty much balanced out 🙂

    Mindful Mimi´s last blog post..Sunday laugh

  • Evan – Yes! Giving when your well is full = joyous. Giving when your well is empty = painful.

    Mimi – Same here. Thank goodness my husband understands and sees the benefits of “me time”.

  • Yes, I do. But you probably already guessed that. Given that my business is based on promoting personal and professional well-being, I absolutely believe in “me-time”, breaks, self-care…whatever you want to call it. I feel that in order to “preach it” I need to practice it. That said, it is still a challenge. Especially when surrounded by people who don’t yet understand the benefits.

    Stacey Shipman´s last blog post..Is Coffee the Answer to Focus and Productivity?

  • Thanks for this post. What came up for me when I read it was how much our emotional states impact each other, even though we aren’t usually aware of it. If I take care of myself well enough to be in a calm place, others can actually feel that for themselves, and so by taking a little time to be “selfish” I can actually create a happier world.

  • In the past 32 years I have had very little “self nurturance” time, and now I do have time and I keep filling it up with things I want to do, but that I have to remind myself is for me, but not so nurturing.

    I had to give up my weekly massages in this money situation and even with stretching and walking I can not achieve a full body relaxed enough to be pain free or able to get deeply into my meditation time…I can tell the difference.

    I am trying to find a friend who needs some me time to trade something for a massage, like my mother and her friends traded doing each others hair and giving perms and cuts.

    I have my daughter’s Dragon Dictate program and Have started just talking into it and then looking at what I said a few hours later to make sure I am listened too….it helps me problem solve to say it…

    I miss the people interaction too…Me time is coming back but it takes vigilance and perseverance for me.

    Patricia´s last blog post..And The Winner Is!

  • Liz

    I have come across your blog and I have to say that I completely disagree with this philosophy of life. From my perspective, it is this “ME FIRST” mindset has been the root to most (if not all) of the evil we see in our world today. From corporations that look only at the bottom line of how a merger will positively affect THEM and THEIR pockets to personal transactions where individuals are only concerned with how THEY make out in the deal to self-activists who believe that THEIR beliefs give them the right to hurt others who disagree to couples who decide that THEY would be happier breaking a vow despite how it might affect their children’s lives, this ME, ME, ME philosophy is poison to our humanity and creates more injustice than justice, love and peace. You may disagree, but I find a better focus of living to be just the opposite:

    1 If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion,
    2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.
    3 DO NOTHING OUT OF SELFISH AMBITION OR VAIN CONCEIT (my caps), but in HUMILITY consider others BETTER THAN YOURSELVES.
    4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
    5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
    6Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
    7 but made himself nothing, taking the very NATURE OF A SERVANT… (Phil. 2:2-7)

    I, for one, choose to eschew the “ME FIRST” lifestyle and philosophy for this other that will bring hope, justice, peace and freedom to those whom I love, those whom I interact with, and even to those whom I have yet to meet.
    Does this tire me out? Create an imbalance? Ignore some inner child need for nurturing? Not in the least! My strength comes from the Lord and is RENEWED MORNING BY MORNING. Through this strength I can do ALL THINGS and yet be refreshed, nourished and refilled moment by moment. This life we live is not about US. It is about OTHERS – how we treat them, how we relate to them, how we love them, how we bring them a hope and a future. If not for this, what truly is the purpose of living?

  • Wow. Your post brought to life an important principle about serving others. As women, we are so often about serving others and tending to their needs. We often volunteer for more things than we ideally should, take care of our families and may be involved in our church. Then if we have any energy left, we may quickly do something for ourself.

    I agree with your 100%, we have to take care of ourselves. If we constantly put ourselves last on the list, we run the risk of being overwhelmed, frustrated, and possibly not healthy.

    Thanks for sharing.

    Robin Wright´s last blog post..The Obama’s Night Out

  • Hi Liz,

    I think you raise an important point. It seems to me that (in secular terms) health is a particular kind of self-forgetfulness. That is, when we are healthy we get interested in other people and projects quite naturally. The unhealthy kind of self-forgetfulness is when it is forced – (in theological terms) the spirit of life in Christ Jesus sets us free from this death.

    Jesus and the apostles all had a strong sense of their own individuality and mission.

    This brings us to what I think is the deepest aspect of this conflict: that we are not isolated individuals but social individuals. Care for others (love, compassion) involves the core of who we are.

    It seems to me that meeting others from our core and at their core benefits both. This means that expressing ourselves from the core of who we are can benefit others.

    I hope I am making sense – there are many issues and fairly big ones I think involved in this discussion.

  • Evan, Thank you for responding to Liz in such a competent style…because I was just about jumped up and shouted at her from here – “This kind of destructive thinking has been rammed down women’s throats for years and years and has produced more guilty energy in the universe than I care to add any more energy to at this time.”

    Everyone is open to their own belief systems which work for them…but what you have written here has nothing to do with how loving I understand God to be and what a radical Jesus was…I do not share your views and you may not attack mine.

    What this post is about is balance and self care which enables one to live life more fully – it is not about selfish – greed and abuse of people – this is about love and fulfillment of hope. We need more of that kind of thinking to help us be our best.

    I have now heard two clergy yell this stuff about being too self centered “ME,ME ME” and because women were not doing their “right work” is why two women were Raped. The two women had put themselves between a mentally ill man with a gun and freed his children to live. One of these two brave women committed suicide because she had failed her clergy’s image of God.

    Patricia´s last blog post..And The Winner Is!

  • Hi Stacey!

    It’s been awhile since I’ve been here or any other blogs for that matter! Truth be told, I have been busy taking care of myself to the fullest. By this I mean, though I take care of myself everyday by working out, my plate was always so completely full that I essentially was not taking care of myself enough.

    It’s been a month now since I’ve not had to go in to work so the days and weeks have been my own and I have been taking care of myself completely! And the point is, in order to give of yourself to others, you need to have something to give…if you do not take care of yourself first, then you won’t be focused and healthy enough to give of yourself completely.

    Pardon the rambling but, when you take care and give to yourself first, you automatically give to others wholeheartedly!

    It’s good to be here to check my “balance” because in all things, always balance.

    “To give is to expect nothing back; to receive is to suspect nothing for!” ~Henie~

    Thank you so much for this post!

    Henie´s last blog post..Does Heaven Really Have A Door?

  • I recently wrote my manifesto on my blog, and in it I included a discussion on my top values. While writing this I realized that the number one thing I value is ME. If I am not a bit selfish and take the time to care for me, then I do a really horrible job helping and taking care of others.

    For me to be successful in my work as a teacher, coach, husband, and father I need to be happy. If I am not, then I start to take it out on those around me. How do I keep myself happy? By thinking about me sometimes, and making sure that I am taken care of.

    When I worked as a Crisis and Suicide Prevention counselor one of the most important courses we had to take was on self-care, and how, without self-care, we would be of no use to our clients. Sometimes our client’s lives depended on us being “with them” in the moment and we were trained that the only way to do that properly was to first make sure that we were taken care of, basically: be selfish.

    I would argue that people who are selfish first, then focus on helping others, are far better prepared to truly help other people.

    Jeremie´s last blog post..Monday Action Setting. May 31 – June 6.

  • Perhaps this is a bit of a male versus female thing as most men, myself included, have less trouble with this idea than women. I fully believe this is an important issue and you MUST take care of yourself. No way around it.

    @Liz- I love the passage from Philippians as well, but I read it differently. If we as believers are called to be like Christ and follow His example in service to others, if there is no self to sacrifice, how is it service? Christ spent loads of time alone and recharging with His Father (I would call that “me” time). We are to draw our strength from God and to continually rely on Him, this is where we gain the ability to serve others.

    Christ even gave us an example of an appropriate “me first” mindset in His ability to say no (He would withdraw form some crowds to be alone or leave a town in the night to avoid the crowds) in order to be about His Father’s work.

    “Me first” in a selfish mindset is bad, I completely agree. But “me first” in a self-care mindset is beneficial for all involved. Just my thoughts. God Bless.

    Corey – Simple Marriage´s last blog post..A Great Marriage By Subtraction?

  • I know that I don’t take enough “me” time especially lately. I’m sure that is why I am so stressed and tense. I think tomorrow will be a “Me” day to see if I’m not more calm, relaxed, and focused.

    Tobi´s last blog post..The Fire Continued

  • Ryan

    One way to a happy life is through service. That law is set in stone as far as I’m concerned. Another way is through having children, which unsurprisingly is an act of great service. You gain the most when you serve–meaning you gain much more by serving others than by serving yourself.

  • I really really try to find time each day for “me” time. But the more active my kids get the harder I am finding time for myself- there is always something to be done, rather its cleaning, cooking, or running my girls around. I also go to school full time- and that to me isn’t “me” time because I see that as work now a days too.
    Thats one of the main reason’s why I started blogging. First I started my personal blog, and now I am trying to get into reveiwing because it’s something that I enjoy- and I fell like I can write, and still somewhat hopefully give back to my family also.

    BTW- I just found your blog tonight, and I think its amazing 🙂

    Nikki´s last blog post..Mission Mommy great blog makeover giveaway!

  • I definitely agree with you that there should be a balance in the way we give. Give in such a way as to enrich all and not to diminish any 🙂

    Jocelyn at I TAKE OFF THE MASK´s last blog post..Bear Children Begotten of Love

  • I definitely set aside time for myself. It is easy to get carried away just planning for my kids or to work on the internet. However, I know that if I don’t get my “me” time, I can be pretty dysfunctional for the rest of my day. I would rather do some form of pre-planning so that I can maintain my sanity.

    Evelyn Lim´s last blog post..The School of Life

  • Liz

    Corey – I agree with you and agree that Jesus did set an excellent example of recharging with the Father in order to continue on his work without burn-out or bitterness. My problem is with those who take this idea to the extreme – who put self first ALWAYS and to the detriment of others. Who trample others in order to meet their own needs. I believe many in our generation and the generation behind me look much more to their own interests than to the interests of others. There are PLENTY of examples in our society of putting self first. Look at most of our reality TV shows. They speak a strong message to those who watch, especially children.

    Patricia — I am not a “religious” woman. I am a woman in relationship from which I draw my strength, purpose and calling. When I am empty, this is how I’m refilled. Not by being consumed with self needs. The original blogger wrote, “I’m concerned we may be giving so much to others that we don’t have enough to give to ourselves.” I disagree and believe that the giving of ourselves is the most important thing we can give to humanity. I want to teach my children “to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke”. I want to teach them to share their food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter. It’s in doing THESE things that we receive health, fulfillment and reward.

    I agree that to do this takes a healthy balance, but not in the sense that the original blogger wrote. I believe we need a “plum line”, an impartial guide that shows us when to give and when to step back. I think most people, given the decision themselves, will err on the side of doing what is best for them without consideration of others around them.

  • Liz,
    “I think most people, given the decision themselves, will err on the side of doing what is best for them without consideration of others around them.”
    This statement just makes me feel so sad. I have consistently not found it to be true in my life.

    Patricia´s last blog post..A Modern Fairy Tale

  • Hi Stacey,
    I’m sorry but I wish I could give myself permission for that “me” time. My husband always tells me to give myself a break. I’m currently seeking therapy to help with some of these issues. Basically, I think it’s Irish Catholic guilt that if I’m not doing something for someone else or just “doing something” like cleaning or cooking or homework…just something, then I’m a lazy piece of crap. Type A personality rears its ugly head. Oh well, I will survive…with clean dishes!
    Thanks for the reminder – we all need it.
    Shannon

  • Thank you and I agree. The sure power of giving puts you on the frequency, brings you closer to the source of creative energy. I am thankful for overstanding the concept of giving more use value than monetary value. Honestly, if the powers that be would shift their prospective from what can I take to what I can give, the economy would turn around overnight. A united majority focus on abundance, health, wealth, education and prosperity for everyone, would sling shot the world into a perpetual windfall of receiving all the magnificence and glory nature has to offer.

    Keith Cook´s last blog post..How To Overcome Fears

  • Liz

    Patricia — it makes me sad too. And frustrated. Count your blessings that you have not personally experienced that a lot in your life, but all you have to do is turn on the local or world news or reality tv show, or read a newspaper to see the evidence and consequences of selfish self-love. It’s inherent in mankind. I’m not saying that there is no good or giving or serving of one’s self out there at all, just that it is not the natural inclination in human nature. What the world needs a plum line.

  • Liz,
    In my 32 years of working with people, helping children, holding hands, and listening – I have heard so much greed, selfishness, and absurdity you can not imagine….I had to find my core self, which is kindness, and then figure out how to extend that to all people – that is my calling, that is what I am supposed to do. I had to learn how to put down fear at a moments notice…and if I was not taking care of myself – keeping my values cup full, I made many mistakes…one cost a fellow counselor her life, because I did not respond from my self.
    Yes, there are some horrible people who did horrible things to others, and I am hoping that our former leaders will be investigated for their war crimes and crimes against humanity. I try not to watch the so called news/tv any more – it is negative entertainment to me.
    I want no child to suffer any more and every person to have food and health care….
    Look, look and see….today a fellow lake walker took a homeless beggar woman and got her a hot meal, a shower, a warm bed for tonight/shelter, and to the clinic for medical care – then she paid for it all….5 days worth of “me” time for someone else…
    If I wanted to steal Stacey’s blog space here I could list 100 acts of loving kindness people have performed in the first 3 days of this week…..just look, look and see. Its all around…
    I am glad you have a plum line…it will work for you…the more scary stuff you look for the more you will see….I am grateful for our dialogue and thank Stacey for letting it evolve.

    Patricia´s last blog post..A Modern Fairy Tale

  • The light within me honors the light within you. I will respond to everyone soon. Nameste.

  • Stacey Shipman – I like how you think about “ME TIME” as break for self care.

    Chris – “If I take care of myself well enough to be in a calm place, others can actually feel that for themselves” – well said! I love this second-hand benefit of self care.

    Patricia
    – I think self nurturing is a practice. I love the idea of finding a friend to trade something for a massage. I also find that me time takes vigilance and perseverance.

  • Liz – When I became a working mom back in 2003, I knew I had to balance the needs of my inner authentic self with the needs of all the other things that demanded my time, attention, and energy. I am now committed to helping other moms balance their essential “me” time with everything else that demands their time, attention, and energy.

    When I refer to “me” time, I am referring to acts of self care and moments to reconnect with your authentic sense of self. My definition of “me” time includes finding moments for silence & stillness each day, finding time to be focused on your dreams/passions, taking action on your dreams, connecting/socializing with others, connecting with your evolving and growing authentic sense of self, using your natural inner gifts to pay it forward, focusing on your fitness goals, and finding moments to rest & escape the daily grind.

  • Robin – I do believe the more we practice self care, the more we can authentically serve others.

    Evan – Thank you for bringing up health. If we aren’t healthy (body, mind, and spirit) it is very difficult to give to others. I love what you said about humans being social individuals – “Care for others (love, compassion) involves the core of who we are”.

    Patricia – Cheers to living life more fully and to living our best lives.

  • Henie – I have been spending more time taking care of myself and less time on the blogosphere too (it’s all about balance, right). “…when you take care and give to yourself first, you automatically give to others wholeheartedly” – I love that!

    Jeremie – I love how you are declaring how much you value yourself. I’m seeing a common thread here that if you don’t take the time to care for yourself, then you can’t fully help and take care of others.

    Corey – I hear from a lot of men that it is a lot easier for them to have me time. I also think being able to say “no” is a great example of carving out me time.

    Tobi – I’d love to know if you felt more calm, relaxed, and focused after your “me” day.

    Ryan – I also think paying it forward (serving) is a critical element to holistic balance.

  • Nikki – Thank you for sharing you struggle with finding me time. I think most moms feel this way, which is why I creating this blog.

    Jocelyn – Exactly. Enriching ourselves and others is wonderful. Diminishing our energy is not healthy.

    Evelyn – I also find setting time each day for myself helps me with the chaos of motherhood. I find I’m more present (more in a state of being) with my children if I know there is also time and space in the day for me.

  • Shannon – Give yourself time and take baby steps. As SARK says, you are outrageously wonderful and deserve to be celebrated!

    Keith – Thank you for sharing your perspective. A world filled with inner abundance and giving sounds beautiful.

  • I’m so bad about this, I really am. At work, I’m the go-to person when everyone needs to get something done. I don’t mind because I do enjoy helping others, but I’m feeling very run-down lately. I did take some time for myself today. I had a massage and a relaxing nap after. But, I’m still exhausted. I have a lot on my plate and so many goals I’m trying to meet. I need to find a better way to handle the balance and the me-time.

    This also affects me financially as well. Last night, as an example, we had a bridal shower for one of our co-workers. We figured out how much we’d need in order to buy her a present and take her to dinner at a fairly pricey restaurant, but one we knew she’d love. At the end of the night, we came up a little short. Everyone sort of looked around and then turned to me. I sort of felt obligated to pay the rest. It wasn’t much, like $10, but I had put in my share already so I was kind of annoyed that they looked at me. One other lady did offer to throw in some cash with mine, but I declined out of obligation, despite there being no real obligation. But, we teach people how to treat us, so there you go. They expect that behavior from me and now I’ve got to break that mentality.

    Kristy @ Master Your Card´s last blog post..The Cost of Owning Pets