Dear Children,
You are the loves of my life and I love being you mom.
When I was reading The Wisdom of the Enneagram this morning I came across a section about unconscious childhood messages parents transmit onto their children… messages that effect your growing identity and impact your capacity to be fully YOU in the world. It went as far as saying that these negative messages have the ability to force the expansive brilliance of your soul to shut down to varying degrees.
“Oh No”, I thought. I never want to consciously or unconsciously shut down any part of the expansive brilliance of your soul.
And yet, knowing I am not perfect, I’m sure there were probably times over the last 9 and 11 years that I have shut down your light.
The book also mentioned messages that every child needs to hear. And from my soul to yours, I want to make sure you receive these messages.
So today, I’m choosing to create a new tradition for our family. I’m choosing to consciously bring these loving messages to you. These are messages I’ve been trying to teach you, but I’ve never consistently said these words to you… allowing them to deeply sink into your mind, body, and soul.
So think of this as an experiment. Yes, I’m expecting some eye rolling. Some “Geez mom, I get the picture”. And some “Mom, you are so cheesy” comments too.
I’m prepared for these kinds of responses since I’m starting this ritual now instead of starting when you were a newborn. And I’m going to do it anyway.
You may not fully understand these words. They may not sink in completely each day when I say them to you. That’s okay. Again, think of this as an experiment. Let these words soak into your body like medicine. Let these words nourish your soul. Store this wisdom inside of you. I promise, they will come in handy one day.
So, rolls your eyes if you must. All I ask is for you to take a deep breath and be open to these words I speak…
It’s okay to make mistakes.
It’s okay to have your own needs.
It’s okay to have your own feelings and identity.
It’s okay to be functional and happy.
It’s okay to be comfortable in the world.
It’s okay to trust yourself.
It’s okay to be vulnerable and to lean in to your community.
It’s okay to assert yourself.
You are good.
You are wanted.
You are loved for yourself.
You are seen for who you are.
Your needs are not a problem.
You are safe.
You will be taken care of.
You will not be betrayed.
YOUR PRESENCE MATTERS.
With so much love,
Mom
Stacey, this is a warm, heart-felt letter! They may roll their eyes now, but I’m sure your children will look back on it when they are older & be so thankful that you were their Mom. You will guide them through life with your soul-inspired wisdom & nurturing. 🙂
How neat. Brought tears to my eyes. I hope your kiddos realize how lucky they are to have you as their Momma!
Awww…. thanks Jennifer.
So beautiful! Your kids are truly blessed with a great mom!
So beautiful Stacey! And while I think sometimes we are totally too hard on ourselves, and that what we do as parents allows our loves to shine through, I think these are great messages to work on. I have started telling my kids that I love them exactly as they are. Sure, I want them to be in more control of their behaviors but if that can’t ever happen, that’s ok. I love and accept them RIGHT NOW. Thank you for sharing this!
I saw this post last week and saved it for later. I’m glad I came across it again on mymetaworld.. beautiful. Sharing on my page! Keep up your great work!